Friday, February 4, 2011

Bullying

 This is a subject near and dear to my heart.  My fourteen year old is pretty stacked for someone his age.  Five foot, nine, he towers over me.  His body looks like he's been lifting weights all his life, but honestly, he's been this way ever since he was pulled out of me.  At 9 pounds, 14 ounces, I said he was going to be a football player.  He should have made his team's, MVP last year, but because of his short temper, he didn't get it.  I still believe the coaches coaching tactics did more to harm him than encourage him to be the best that he could be.  Getting back on topic, he has been accused of being a bully.  I beg to differ.  Is it his fault that the people who push his buttons are smaller in stature than he is?  Several times, my son has been involved in incidents that involved smaller individuals picking on him.  When I say picking on him, I'm saying purposely starting confrontations with him and when he tries to stand up for himself, he's the bully.

I really don't appreciate this mischaracterzation as I know for a fact that I've taught my children to never start confrontations and always get an adult involved before they get themselves in trouble.  Time and time again, I've gotten calls from his school that he hit another student who was much smaller than him.  I always ask the question, "who started it?"  I researched the word bullying, and it says bullying consists of three basic types of abuse, emotional, verbal and physical.  It goes on further to say that it typically involves subtle methods of coercion such as psychological manipulation.  This is all according to Wikipedia.

Although my son may be bigger than the person intimidating him, why is he always considered the bully?  If it's true that he is only responding to what is being done to him, does that really make him the bully?  My son is super-sensitive and doesn't let too much roll off his back.  No matter how much I talk to him about turning the other cheek, or ignoring ignorant comments from classmates, he still can't seem to let things slide.  But does this make him a bully?  Parents, please teach your children to mind their manners and leave others alone.  If your child has the Chiwawa syndrome, which I've coined  people who may be small in stature, but still have the audacity to pick on someone much bigger than they are, warn them that one day, that pit bull who's been minding their own business is going to let nature take its course and deliver something short of a can of whoop-a** on them.  Until next time..."Live your life by loving yourself."